Book Update by Weaver

By Weaver

The book was finished many weeks ago, and after many weeks of pestering those kind of people who can get a book published, I have decided to (well, no other choice) self-publish. Unknown writer + fiction + short stories + no solid genre + my insipid writing styles + too much awesome = do it yourself. But, I feel that this book will not disappoint. I know horrible writing when I read it, and there is a section in the book proving this, with myself providing the horrible writing. Read on for the title and finalized Table of Contents of this beautiful mess.

Title: A Wonderful Waste of Time by Pen Name (some guy who writes vampire books shares my name)


Plane to Japan

Short Stories

Drink Your Asshole
Know Karate
Missing Girl
Drinking Buddy
The Ebony Lizard
Time Canyon- Episode 4
Beautifully Scarred
Pappy’s Got an Itchy Trigger Finger
What Was, What Is
A Man of His Time
Dream Story
Easter Game
Immortal Hair
Prophetic Bicuspids
Afternoon Skeletons
Earth Flag
God View
Just One of Those Days
Bar Scenes
Candy Thief
Junior and the Heaven Cake of Rolling Falls
Daytime Daddy
The Day I Almost Killed 5 People and a Cow
The Day I Did Kill 500 People and a Cow
Happy Place
Duncan Manor
Time Well- Spent
Look at That
Douglas and Cookie
Louie Pull
The Mad Whacker
The Tea Party
Wounded Me
Wrong Way
Guy’ s Night Out
Stand- Up Outline
After School Special
Two Boards ( A True Story)
The Worker

Story Extras

Casualties of Prose


Thank You

More info in the near (hopefully) future.


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Your story titles alone have given me seemingly endless amusements for today.

A good book title, too.

It's good that you were able to accomplish this "private victory," Weaver. Remember, we need them (private victories, that is).

Indeed, I have, Chris. Alex wasn't being amused, so I wrote this book with said titles, and in essence, I walked up to his ennui (the "Man"), poured a beer all over it and said, "You're all wet." I guess this is more of a public victory, but you get the idea.

If you like the titles, well, then I guess you like the titles. But the jury is still out on the rest. Though 500 People and a Cow and The Mad Whacker still crack me up, and I've been staring at them for way too long.

Yours truly,


Tina Turner almost recorded a song about private victories, but then some twit came along and changed one of the words in the title.


I just peed a little from both the "Thatch" and "Private Victory" reference.


Christmas has arrived 7 months early. Thank you, Chris.

Private Victories....we need 'em.

Congratulations to you, as well, Tom...I'm looking forward to reading your book.

"Are You Ready Weaver????"

Funny you mention UHF, Herr Doktor, as there is a bit about Weird Al in the first portion of the book.

I just need to find some time to get my Hank fix that has been giving me the shakes since high school. I tried buying a van like Todd's, but it had too many miles on it.

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This page contains a single entry by Weaver published on June 1, 2007 2:52 PM.

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